Waxing Eloquent

A few thoughts from a recent office party:

Attending a party in a wax museum is extremely confusing -

• Looking from a distance, you never know if you are looking at a person or a statue. “I thought you were a statue” is not exactly a good excuse when somebody asks you why you didn't say hello.


• It is very easy to get your picture with any girl, and tell your girlfriend it's just some celebrity. On the other hand, you have to convince your girlfriend every time she sees you getting photographed with a girl.


• When you see people standing around or near a statue, you can easily mistake it for a person. On the other hand, a person standing alone...


• In the similar vein, imagine: you are standing in a group talking. You sense something and look back to find somebody standing at your shoulder. As a courteous person, you move a bit to include the newcomer in the conversation, only to realise that it's a statue. On the other hand...

And, after a long time, here's the latest edition of Quick Quotes Quill* – Celebrity edition:

• “How do they get the clothes on (the statues)?”


• “He's so short.”
  - Standing next to a Barack Obama statue


• “Next time you come here, he will be younger.”
  - Looking at Brad Pitt. (Incidentally, I have seen two museums now and why is Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie the only couple in Madame Tussuad's apart from the Clintons?)


• “He should have auditioned for the part of Benjamin Button.”
  - Tom Cruise – apparently, all of his wives are 11 years younger than the earlier one.

- The Great Eagle Has Spoken

* Earlier editions of Quick Quotes Quill: Part I, Part II, Part III