Monday, December 15, 2008

30 Second Summaries

In today's busy world, the attention spans are getting shorter and shorter. In the world of information superhighways and consequent information overloads, people don't have time to read long pages and pages of reviews of the movies they want to watch, when they can just as well spend that time doing something else.

That's why we at The Aerie Institute, constantly aware of the needs of the times, are bringing you Part 1 of our bestselling series:

30 Second Summaries (Bollywood Edition):

Rab_ne That's the Rab:

After making enough actors weary by stealing (or trying to) others' girlfriends and fiancées (and wives) on screen, Shahrukh Khan has to steal the wife from his own older self. Old habits...



Oye lukcy Con-fiction:

After Jai Jr. tried his hand at the conning game, and got caught and conned in return, it is time for Veeru's nephew to pick up the mantle. Should I have put up a spoiler alert there?



oh_my_god God ~ Jim:

... [when] I want to screw with him to get back at him, he never sees it coming. But now, I want to be nice to him and actually give him something, he's like an eel. I just can't grab onto him.

- Jim Halpert, The Office.



Part 2 will be up soon, based on the response. So, keep commenting.


- The Great Eagle Has Spoken


Previously by Aerie Institute: Non-veg and Attack on Community, FNS or Fanatic about Non-issue Syndrome, The New Updated Spamming-101, A Single Guy's Guide to Dating

Thursday, December 04, 2008

Lord of The Rings is just another hindi movie

Just a few days back, I was talking to a friend who was ranting about the hindi movies, and the completely over the top masala ingredients added in them to spice them up. After defending the Bollywood for a long time (hey, we Indians may make fun of those movies but we are One when some outsider does it), I went back to my recent re-reading of Lord of The Rings.

And I had an epiphany. Here are

10 Reasons why LoTR is just another Bollywood Masala film:

10. If you are a good guy and a father, you get to die at the hands of The Villain or his Henchmen. Which of course will inspire your kid(s) and others to vanquish the villain for revenge.

9. Things are going very badly for the good guys, when BAM! Help arrives in the form of the Hero.

8. The hero has a bumbling but faithful sidekick (or a group of them), who provides the comic sidetrack, but will lay down his life for the hero.

7. There's a costumed villain, sitting in his snazzy lair, surrounded by costumed henchmen and weird looking followers.

6. The "supporting actress" loves the hero, who cannot return her affections because he is in love with the heroine. But don't worry, she will find her life partner in the "supporting actor" before the climax.

5. The hero and heroine belong to different social groups, and hence her father is not exactly happy about their union, but there is a loving aunt who will help the lovers.

4. The heroine, the one belonging to higher social group in this case, will "sacrifice" her advantages in order to marry the hero.

3. The hero has greedy, conniving, thieving relatives who have their eye on his estate.

2. You can stab him, fire arrows at him, slash at him with swords, poison him... The Hero just goes on and on and on...

1. At moment's notice, there's at least one person who has got to sing up. Sometimes that quickly grows into a group song.


- The Great Eagle Has Spoken


P.S. The comparison is based solely on the books, and those misguided souls who know LoTR as only a movie trilogy may be confused. Solution: read the book.