Friday, September 22, 2006

What Happens In Your Bedroom At Night?

What is the best thing to do in bed at night? What are the things you should not stick in your microwave oven? What are the things that go “boom”? How much weight can you lose in 4 hours? Does the duck's quack echo? What is the best thing to drink after eating hot and spicy food? Do you really believe in science?

If you have these and similar questions, watch “Brainiac: Science Abuse”... the program where they abuse science in the name of entertainment. Or in their own words, “the program where we put science in tight underwear and give it a wedgie”.

I caught the program first when I was in Germany. Flipping channels and ruing the shortcomings in my education (to wit, not having learnt German), I came across a British program, which started off with a bang, literally. And from then on, me and my friends were totally hooked onto the program. Of course, I think it is prudent to mention that the beauties in “Explosive of the week” or the pretty professor who sees “Which fruit floats” had nothing to do with our fascination (OK, very little to do).

After coming back to India and then in US, I constantly surfed the radio waves, trying to find a channel which shows this program. Not much success, although there were some similar program on US Discovery channel (Mythbusters). I was really missing this program... and finally, after much searching I finally got the first season. Party time folks...

Now, before you flag me for “adult content”, let me tell you (at least the people who have read so far), that the answer to the question in subject line is that you lose weight (though sweating) and gain height (and also, don't believe in cassettes which tell you that listening to them while sleeping helps your learning). When you combine this knowledge with the knowledge we get for “Fat V Thin” challenges, we learn that it's better not to face hurricanes in the morning. Or be stuck in north pole in just your swimming costume, or be a passenger on titanic. On the other hand, postpone facing blizzards, or that field trip to desert you always wanted to go on for a morning after a good night's sleep (of course, you can also lose almost 2.5 kg in 4 hours if you are in hurry).

If you can't get on that ride in Disneyland due to height, be there first thing in morning. That way, you can get the help from that added height in morning (or worst case, won't have to wait in line for hours on end before learning the bad news). Also, following things are better out of microwave: a light bulb (of course, the glow is simply great), CD (although it cracks with a beautiful lighting pattern) and a balloon of helium (unless you want the microwave to burst).

If you want to get somewhere in hurry, you can build a hovercraft out of items you get from a store (but don't rely on it to cross The Channel). You can also stick a container of compressed carbon dioxide on it for adding the extra bit of speed, as CO2 has conquered land and water (though space is still conquered by bottled water and compressed air).

But there is a bad news for all of us. If you heard that looking at women's breasts for 30 minutes is equivalent to 30 minutes of exercise, unfortunately it's not so. Also, a duck's quack echoes. And apparently, imagining your interviewers to be nude does not help in case of an attack of interview nerves.

Remember that the cooking oil used in our kitchen is the slipperiest oil, and you can rely on masking tape to hold your weight for almost 20 minutes before giving up. Milk is the best drink if you want to soothe your tongue after that hot and spicy food you ate. Sprouts are the food to avoid if you don't want smelliest f&%t.

Mobiles may not detonate the petrol fumes, but keep your nylon (or synthetic) clothes at home if you want your friendly neighborhood petrol pump to be still in place after you fill 'er up. Unbreakable safes are, unless confronted by a Challenger 2 (in which case, you might as well say good bye to the stuff inside the safe as well as the safe, so that's fat help). But most of the unbreakable household things aren't (of course in normal conditions, they won't have to deal with detonating helium).

For all sportspersons: While it's best to get out of way of a speeding cricket ball or hockey puck, if you want to be a dare-devil, guards are most important thing to wear. Have no sports drink when you are back after playing? Mix equal amounts of HCl and NaOH. And while sports drinks go in faster, lager comes out faster and more.

And finally, remember that easiest recipe to toss a salad, make chips or have a kebab is
1.Mix all ingredients
2.Stick an explosive charge in it.


Now, on to Season 2... Brainiac...


P.S. Check out the Tickle'e Teasers.


The Great Eagle has spoken...

Quote of The Day:
If you were on a plane going the speed of sound and walked from the back of the plane to the front, would you be walking faster than the speed of sound?
- Jon Tickle

25 Comments:

Cuckoo said...

Good info. Nice post.
I have seen some of the questions of Tickle's Teasors before. Quite interesting and quite a timepass. :)

SiD said...

"Sprouts are the food to avoid if you don't want smelliest f&%t. "

hahahha.... now I know the reason of the smells which were found in the gym in the morning!!!

Fleiger said...

@Cuckoo: The show is quite good. Watch it if you get it. I think at least Mythbusters is on Discovery India.

@Sid: Well, there are some more culprits too.But sprouts, they are the worst.

SiD said...

ofcourse.. there will be many more.. mooli ka parantha is another big Smelly factor...
while working out, sprouts are an imp part of diet and they are generally taken in the morning.. thats why I was specific regd their effect in gym..;)

Cuckoo said...

Yeah, agree with SiD. Mooli paranthas.. in fact many other.. what abt raw egg or garlic..

Not sure abt sprouts though ;)

Fleiger said...

@Sid and Cuckoo: They tried sprouts, eggs, fizzy drinks (colas) and beans.
Sprouts came out on top, though with eggs are very close second...

Thank god I went to gym in mysore in evenings ;)

silverine said...

Wow!!! That was awesome! Now I wish we had that porgramme in India. Maybe I will write to Star TV.

Fleiger said...

@Silverine: Long time since you been here... welcome back. The programme runs on Sky-three channel. Mythbusters is on Discovery. If you get it in India, tell me. Will have something good to watch next time I am there, instead of Saas-bahu and mythological serials :)

niki yokota said...

oh woow fleiger-chan was in Germany!?
such a genius!!!
im getting woozy after reading so many questions lol
thanks for ur hilarious post!!

Fleiger said...

@nikichan: My company sent me to Germany for 2 months last year...
Here's what I did on first trip:
http://randamthots.blogspot.com/2006/03/there-and-back-and-again.html

The show is also very hilarious...

Cuckoo said...

Hey!!! What happened to your blog? It has changed into new clothes?

tulipspeaks said...

kekeke.. i had fun reading this one. yea, mythbusters..i know that show. watch it occationally.


=ammu=

Fleiger said...

@Cuckoo: I wanted some things in Beta to be included in my blog, so had to change my template. And then, I thought why not change it completely. Will work on this soon, and customize it. Don't have time to do it now for a week... till that time, check out "Labels" in sidebar.

@Tulip: Yes, this show is one of my favourites. I love these shows because they teach science in a funny ways.

Cuckoo said...

Wow ! Your blog looks so wonderful now.. almost as good as I had pictured mine ;) (the invisible one). Thinking of shifting that to Beta.
Tell me, how much will it take in all to shift to Beta with 3 blogs?

All the Best for your mid-term!
Be cool :P

Fleiger said...

@Cuckoo: Thanks... you must be disoriented by quick changes by now...

Anyways, shouldn' take more than 10-15 min to shift to beta. Just make sure you take note of the stuff in sidebar and also font changes etc if any. I found that the sidebar contents needed to be added again after I shifted to beta.

Phoenix Rises said...

Woah! It felt like you had typed the entire post at the "speed of light"!! Hehe!
I read the 'List of Tickle's Teasers'. I'd read some of these before in some forwards I'd gotten. Some were funny, some were just nonsensical, and some actually made me think!! :D

Phoenix Rises said...

BTW, what does "Adlergedanke" mean??

niki yokota said...

woow! ur trip to Germany was so very COOL!!!!
Got up at 6am everyday and stayed hotel?? :o
oh i want to do that whispering interpretor when u come to japan! haha~
thanks for the link!!!!

Fleiger said...

@Phoenix: Is it so bad? I wrote the post almost in one sitting with minimal amount of editing, that's true. But why did you think that?
Most of Tickle's teasers are generally known through mails and forwards... but some of them merit the intro, "The questions that make you go, 'hmmm...'"
And Adlergedanke means (in slightly, maybe highly corrupted version) "Thought of eagle"...

@Nikichan: Sure, I would love to have you as interpreter... The trip was bit fun, and bit heavy work. But I enjoyed the country a lot...

Ketaki said...

hey!! :)
that was awesome! yay, my first time here, n looks like i'll be coming back ;)

Fleiger said...

@Ketki: Welcome... I have been to your blog once or twice, (though need to go through it in detail) and happy to note that you posted ahead of schedule...
Do visit my other blog too...

Sreejith Kumar said...

This was an interesting assortment! The heading was worth arousing curiosity! LOL

I was also about to ask you the meaning of Adlergedanke and am satisfied with the highly corrupted version you gave....

Fleiger said...

@Sreejith: Thanks... When I heard them say, what happens... I thought that should make a great heading for a post ;) I was sure at least some people would be interested enough in reading ahead when they blog-hop. (publicity stunt, you know)
Hmm, I wouldn't actually mind some german speaking person to correct me if I am wrong. Wouldn't mind changing it to correct version, as long as it means Eagle's Thought(s)...

Phoenix Rises said...

I just meant that the post sounded very "breathless". The flow seems fast. That's all! :)

Fleiger said...

@Phoenix: Did I tell you I envy you that name?
"Koi jo mila to muze..." you have succeeded in putting that song in my head now... Yes, the post was one sitter post for a change, and the show is great :)